New Years.

As 2010 comes to a close, I can't help but reflect on what a year this has been for my family and I.
This time last year, I would have just been telling people that I was expecting and I was finding that a lot of support was where I didn't expect it. The 8 weeks between once I found out I was pregnant (yes I know, super late) and when Madison arrived was a blur with getting ready for baby's arrival with getting baby . Once Maddie arrived, this year just picked up it's pace as we went through parenthood learning how to be the best parents possible. Once we started getting the hang of things, I decided to go back to school to pursue my nursing degree when Madison was 4 months old. Things were just as hectic throughout the summer as we had planned our first vacation as a family with Jon's family to Leavensworth. It was a great vacation for us to get away, but as soon as we got back, the next day we were off to go camping with my family. It was fun to see my relatives from Idaho and just have them meet the newest member of the family (Madison, of course). As summer dwindled down so did the traveling and hectic scheduling as we settled into a routine just in time as school started up for both Jon and I. Things picked up as our schedule consisted of classes for all three of us, including Madison's kindermusik. As the holidays drew near, we prepped for them as much as we could with decorations and shopping for loved ones. To sum up the holidays I can say that it was filled with family, friends, and even more family! Madison was able to meet her great grandparents and spend time with both as well as with family from out of state!

This year has definitely been a crazy year mixed with lots of memories to cherish. To end on a high note now has been a blessing knowing that Jon and I have been able to reconnect and come back to being whole again as a couple as well as realizing that we do need our alone time as well as our together time without baby to just cherish our time together. Growing up has happened on both our ends and I can see that we are great parents. With the support of both of our families and friends, we will be able to one day look back and realize how lucky and blessed we are with everyone loving Madison and us. 2011 will be a new year of good change and it will just enhance our future as we look towards to bigger and brighter things :) 


Thank you to all my family and friends for being there for us as we dealt with struggles and got through each one stronger than the other.

Happy New Years everyone and I hope 2010 was good to you, may 2011 bring you even more joy!

Biting baby.

Lately Madison has been teething and for me, it's been tolerable until recently. She's been biting me when nursing and it hurts (badly)! I don't know how to stop her from it, but she finds it funny and just laughs. She also is developing a habit of biting me or anyone for that mater, when she is being held by someone. She has bitten me on my arm and shoulder, there was a close call on the neck but I was able to move her in time. How do you stop a baby of this habit so it doesn't get worse? Any suggestions?

Merry Christmas!

                                                       Merry Christmas everyone!

As the holiday comes to an end, I can't help but feel happy for Madison and her first time experiencing Santa, presents, and all the joy of Christmas! We went to Jon's parents house early at 9 am and ate delicious fresh crossaints from Pike Place with fresh berries (yum)! We opened gifts and it took over an hour, Madison seemed more interested in the wrapping paper than any of her toys she received.Overall, she seemed to love all her gifts with the exception of her new tickle-me-elmo! She was frightened of him because of his laughter, I felt bad because I couldn't do anything about it except hide it from her to calm her down. I hope she will eventually like it, let's hope. I even got a surprise gift from Jon-a new laptop :) It was such a surprise, I didn't know what to say after, but I'm loving it and can't wait to have skype dates with friends and family. After gifts we headed home and decided to head down to Tacoma. Madison slept right through it all because she was so exhausted from getting gifts with Jon's family.

Once we got down, we opened more presents with my family. Madison loved it once again especially all the wonderful jackets she received. She will never be a naked baby that's for sure! We went out to my Aunt's house to reunite with family and lifelong friends I've grown up with. It is so weird to see everyone all grown up and all older than the last time we reunited which was many moons ago! Madison loved seeing her many "aunties." This has been a great Christmas by far and I can't wait for Madison's next Christmas when she will open even more gifts I'm sure.


Happy holidays everyone and I hope you all had a memorable and wonderful day!

coming to terms.

As Christmas eve comes to an end, I find myself accepting a lesson that only took years to understand. To begin, my little family and I went to the Miller's for the yearly Christmas eve party. It was great and fun to see everyone and whatnot until I overheard Jon talking to his best friend, Reed saying that my parents live in the ghetto and I never invited him down for Christmas...he said more stuff and it hurt my feelings. I strayed away from him for the rest of the evening until it was time to head home. I couldn't contain myself the second we got home, Madison asleep already from the car ride was laid in her crib peacefully, as I broke down into tears pissed off at Jon for his hurtful words. He asked me what was wrong, I being a woman said "nothing." Of course, he knew something was eating at me from my tears and rumbling around making noise. I just said "I heard you talking shit about my parents." This is when he tells me the realization I didn't want to come to terms with all my life, my parents are awkward to be around. Yes I know they are not the most social people, but don't tell your best friend that only to have me hear. We talked, well me more yelling my emotions of anger, bitterness, and disdain for him at that moment. Once I finally cooled down, I realized something. Growing up I always thought your parents are judged based on the way you came off, and vice versa. Now I'm realizing that we are individuals and as we grow up, our parents either change or stay the same. In my case they stayed stuck in their ways with my mom teaching us her filippino heritage while my dad attempts to tell jokes. I always told myself that I never wanted to be like my parents growing up because they didn't allow me to express or really be myself growing up and I still do believe that. Let me get it out there, I do love them to death, but we've never seen eye to eye and this is one circumstance. Jon made me realize that people aren't judging me based on my parents, they aren't judging me based on where I grew up. They are judging me based on where I go in life and how I raise Madison. My view of why parents are the way they are is yet to be defined as I continue learning to be a parent, but coming to terms that my parents aren't perfect nor will they ever be is a good way to begin my journey.


On a holiday note, Merry Christmas!

then and now...

Happy 10 months to my baby girl :)
Everyday I look at her and just smile, she is such a blessing and I can't believe it was just one year ago it all changed.


THEN...
I can't believe one year ago this day things changed for me. This was the day I took a pregnancy test, I found out I was pregnant. When I saw that I was, I cried. I don't know how long I did, but it was my reaction. I didn't know what to think or what to do. I had to make sure the test was right so I went to see a doctor about it and she confirmed I was pregnant. I cried even more because now I needed to tell everyone, I wish I could say I was excited, but I was more scared if anything as to what everyone else would think especially since I was 29 weeks along. I know, I found out way later than usual. Telling our family and friends made me realize that I did have more support than I thought.

NOW...
It's amazing what 365 days do to one person's life. I am so surprised how much can change in a year, yes I had a baby, but so much more. My perspective on life has changed for the brighter and my hopes for Madison just make me happy knowing that we are raising a wonderful baby girl. I wasn't back in school, now I am heading towards my goal of becoming a nurse and have a plan made out. Jon and I have our eyes towards the future and making Madison a strong, independent girl. I realized in the past year that I have found a deeper love for life and for family.

Thank you Madison for changing our life, we love you for it!

Balance.

Now that school is done for the quarter, it's time to spend some quality family time with Jon and Madison.

We haven't had many family days because Jon and I have schedules that are the opposite school wise and we both just have never gotten the timing right. Realizing that we have a family now, I have come to realizations that we don't spend enough time together as a family. Yes Madison and I spend a lot of time together, but it's never really been Jon, Madison, and I. Looking back on my childhood, it was a great childhood but I can't remember a lot of times with my whole family together spending time enjoying the presence of one another. It was either both my parents were there yet my sister or brother weren't. Or my dad would be at work while mom was with us kids. Life got in our  way and I wish it didn't. I don't want life to get in our way. I know it will in time, but I can delay that time and spend as much time making memories with Madison and Jon as a family up until she starts to resent her parents, which I hope never happens yet she will become a teenager which is just one of the common occurrences in their lives.
Balancing school, work, and whatever else happens is what we need to make more time for family. Seeing all the families torn apart due to the military is heartbreaking especially when I know, my family is right in front of me and I'm not taking full advantage. I hope Jon and I cherish all the time we have with her at this age. Here's to family planned events for us :) Family pictures will be this Friday which I'm looking forward too, and yes to my friends, you will be getting a cheesy holiday card from us with a family picture, our first of many to come :)



On a side note, I passed my biology class with an A (99.6%), yes I did..whoot whoot! Now bring it on A&P!

Day dreamer.

As school dwindles down (2 classes left!) and the holidays approach, I can't help but daydream about Madison's first holidays experience. I know I shouldn't do that in class, but it's hard not too!

Thanksgiving was a hit for her as she interacted with five women and two men including her great Grandmother Ileen, Grandmother Karen, Aunt Heather, Aunt Ambre, Grandpa Lee, and daddy and her mommy (me, of course)! She was constantly laughing and smiling with all the attention she was getting and so many people to play with. Her first and only nap of the day, yes only one nap was at 11:30 am until noon and yes she was up for the rest of the day. I would say she took nap around five, but it only lasted for five minutes. She was a trooper though sitting down through four courses of Thanksgiving dinner, of course she dined with us in her high chair :)

Here are some pictures from Thanksgiving! Enjoy!


                                          

1st course: a delicious salad with walnuts, bleu cheese, and more

                                  

2nd course: a potato dish mixed with olives and goodness :)

                                          

3rd course: risotto with rack of lamb

                                        

4th course: angel hair pasta with seared scallops and pesto

                                        

Madison waiting for her food :)

Aunt Heather

                                        
                                                                  

Aunt Ambre

        

Grandpa with Madison resting her foot on the table, only she can get away with it.

                                            

Madison reaching for Grandma's glasses off Aunt Ambre. 

                                          

Great Grandma Ileen singing to Madison :)